Run with me in the rain of thoughts...

It has been a long long time since I have last updated this blog...Sorry blog...had neglected you so greatly...well...main reason for doing so is that I am seriously busy with my projects for this short study semester...gomen!~

Anyway, I decided to blog today because I simply had nothing to do, and I have some things that I wanted to say it out...As mentioned in the title, those are the things I am going to rant on today...

I am sick and tired of entertaining people...come on, I think once in a while, everyone will get that sickening feeling and accusation to youself on why you have to entertain people. Well..that hit me now. I hate doing it sometimes, it is a habit, which I think most of us had.

What I mean by entertaining is that when you don't feel like talking, but between you and the other person, there is only silence, you felt compelled to entertain; to say extra stuff just to break the silence. For certain people whom I met, I can speak to them and be very talkative...but when the topics dries up, or for people that I am not close with, it is hard for me to entertain them...ESPECIALLY online chats...that is one major thing I dislike.

I had this friend whome I knew only a couple of months. And I hate talking to that friend because it is only a one-way communication. I am the one who started the chat, but after sometime, what I get from the friend is one or two sentence answers...which is IRRITATING ME!!!! After 2 tries, I finally give up chatting to that person...from then on, I seldom initiate chats because I don't wish to be the one entertaining the person I am keen to chat with...

Other than online chats, there are certain moments in my life recently that I wondered why did I become an entertainer...I realise I am an entertainer when I am with people I don't really like or when I am not feeling talkative. And sometimes, I feel like a hypocrite... And I hate it every now and then... I never speak of it to anyone except to my boyfriend, but today I have to say it out, because something hit me this week...let me relate to you..

On saturday, I had an intensive seminar with our curtin lecturer...She is a very young and intelligent person and she impressed me. However, she is a strict and impartial person who can be seen as a super bitch. I don't think that she is a bitch actually, because I think as a lady lecturer, she has to gain certain respect to herself and make it known to her students that she is no pushover.

Anyway, I had a classmate whom I often hanged out with. Apparently, she dislikes the lecturer, called her a bitch and she hate bitches..So anyway, during the break time, we were sitting at a table when the lecturer came over and sat with us. During our conversation with her, I can't help but noticed that the classmate of mine is happily smiling and talking to the lecturer. I mean, yah...she is the lecturer..so maybe thats why she is behaving that way...then anyway, the lecturer left for awhile to take more of the noodles she ate. When she left, my classmate said, "Oh man...I don't know why of all places she has to come and sit with us."

I kept my silence throughout the conversation...ironic thing was that the lecturer was very interested in my classmate and was mainly talking to her...This incident reminds me yet again why we human beings have to be a hypocrite at times. And really, I hate it...but this thing will be ongoing forever, whether I like it or not.

Okay, I had an irritating thing happening to me today...the stupid beautician had overplucked my eyebrows!!! MY EYEBROWS HAD BECOME A THIN LINE!!!!!!!!!! URGHHHHHHHH... -_-''

I am going to procastinate...my section on world shall leave it to another day to say...hahah....good night!~

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